


the boner incident

by EvanesDust



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Boys Kissing, Confessions, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Mild Language, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Oblivious Derek Hale, Oblivious Stiles Stilinski
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-05-13
Packaged: 2020-03-02 11:22:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18809884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EvanesDust/pseuds/EvanesDust
Summary: Stiles has been pining for years now. He’s used to it, it’s a thing he just lives with because there’s no way that Derek ‘hot as the sun’ Hale would ever like him in a romantic sense. Hell, for the longest time the man didn’t even like Stiles in a platonic sense. But finally—finally—Stiles can say that they’re friends.





	the boner incident

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Jmeelee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jmeelee/gifts).



> for being ever so patient as i try and get my head back in writing 
> 
> very special thank you to [Novkat21](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Novkat21/pseuds/Novkat21) who urged me to write and to [Welsh_Woman](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Welsh_Woman/pseuds/Welsh_Woman) for giving it a thumbs up
> 
> based off a text message i read on pinterest: _i gave you a boner don't ignore me_
> 
> tagging is a thing that i don't know how to do so if you've got a suggestion, lemme know!
> 
> *what even is a 'comma'? as always… all mistakes are my own.*

Stiles has been pining for years now. He’s used to it, it’s a thing he just lives with because there’s no way that Derek ‘hot as the sun’ Hale would ever like him in a romantic sense. Hell, for the longest time the man didn’t even like Stiles in a platonic sense. But finally— _finally—_ Stiles can say that they’re friends.

Over the years they’ve started hanging out periodically. The pair go to the movies, dinners… Derek’s even a regular presence in the Stilinski home during the holidays.

So yeah… Definitely friends.

Which is why the hard press of Derek’s dick in his side is weird. Normally Stiles would write it off cause he himself has been known to pop a weird boner or three where the 'wolf is concerned. Except, in this case, Derek damn near tackled him to the floor because Stiles wouldn’t stop chewing on his pencil? What even is that?

“Uh, Derek? You need some help with something?” Stiles smirks and looks down to where Derek’s pressed against him.

The 'wolf stills over him, face contorted in horror. Which, yeah, that’s not a blow to Stiles’s ego at all. All warmth leaves his body as Derek jumps away. “ _Sorry_ ,” is muttered before Derek flies out of the window leaving Stiles lying on the floor in confusion. Like, _what_?

Slowly, Stiles gets up, dragging a hand through his hair replaying what just happened. Usually doing his homework is without incident, but Stiles could feel Derek staring at him. Or _glaring_ at him might be more accurate. When Stiles called him out on it, Derek growled. _Literally_ growled at him to stop chewing on his pencil! And Stiles, not being a little shit at all, except that he is, did _not_ , in fact, stop chewing on said writing utensil.  
  
It all escalated when Derek jumped up from the desk chair and snatched the apparently offending item directly from Stiles’s mouth. Stiles flailed for a moment before he reached out to try and grab it, practically throwing himself at Derek. He kept trying to get his pencil back, climbing onto the ‘wolf, turning it into an interesting game of keep away. At one point, the pencil was in his grasp, and he tried to make a run for it, but Derek was too fast, and Stiles went down with a loud ‘ _oomph!_ ’

So now he’s here, staring at his open window that Derek jumped from. _Jumped_ from! The 'wolf hasn’t used Stiles’s window since Stiles was in high school, opting to actually use the front door like a normal person. “ _Oh hell no_!” Stiles cries out, and he pushes himself up from the floor. “ _Derek! You get back here_!” It’s useless. The 'wolf is too far now, Stiles knows this even if he didn’t hear the Camaro pull away. A flustered Derek is a Derek that runs. It’s not like it’d be a long run. The new Hale house is just through the woods, surprisingly close to the Stilinski residence.

 _What the hell just happened_ , Stiles asks himself, trying to figure out why Derek ran. Okay, well, it’s obvious why Derek ran. Clearly, he was aroused by something. But what? The ‘wolf hadn’t been on his phone, so porn was out. Although, Stiles supposes Derek could have been visualizing something in his head, except that Derek had been staring at Stiles complaining about the pencil in his mouth. _Oh_! Stiles isn’t stupid. He’s been approached on more than one occasion and told that his mouth looks sinful. But there’s no way...

Stiles pulls out his phone, bringing up Derek’s contact info. He calls him, and it rings all the way to voicemail. His lips purse as he calls again. And again. And again. ‘ _Dammit, Derek, answer your fucking phone_!’ or variations of the sort are left as messages every time the call is ignored. Because Stiles knows that’s what it is. Derek might be letting it ring through, but Stiles knows the 'wolf is staring at it, knuckles probably going white from gripping it tightly every time Stiles’ name pops up.

“Oh, it’s gonna be like that?” Stiles cracks his knuckles and opens his messages, tapping on Derek’s name. His fingers fly over the keyboard sending messages asking to talk. Stiles paces his room for a bit, wanting to give Derek time to respond. He even tries to finish his homework, but all he can do is stare at the unanswered messages on his phone.  
  
There are a few more phone calls and text messages until Stiles hears his dad come home. Opting to try and get his mind off of Derek, Stiles heads down to make dinner.  
  
“Where’s Derek?” The sheriff asks.  
  
He’d been expecting the question seeing as Derek’s car is still in their driveway. Stiles shrugs, not having thought about an excuse for the 'wolf’s absence.

“What do you mean—” The sheriff copies Stiles’ shrug. “His car is here.”  
  
“He ran outta here, and I haven’t been able to get ahold of him. Hence the—” He repeats his earlier gesture. “Probably ran home.”  
  
“Did you have a fight?”  
  
It’s not really a conversation Stiles wants to have with his dad. How is he supposed to explain that Derek left because of an ill-timed boner from apparent fantasies about his mouth? “No, we didn’t have a fight. He just— Okay, kind of?” Stiles rolls his eyes and shakes his head. “I don’t know, dad. It’s _Derek_ , y’know?”

The sheriff huffs but nods. “Well, I’m gonna go change.”

Stiles heads to the kitchen and goes through the pantry and fridge, pulling out ingredients for dinner. His phone buzzes, and he drops it in his haste to answer, but it’s a scam call which he promptly ignores and blocks. With his phone out, Stiles calls Derek a couple more times, leaving more choice words on the 'wolf’s voicemail as well as texts for him to read.

Dinner is surprisingly quiet even though Stiles can tell his dad wants to interrogate him more on Derek’s absence. He’s thankful that he doesn’t. Instead, they talk about school, and Stiles asks his dad about any interesting cases he’s working on, earning an eye roll and a reminder that he can’t speak about ongoing investigations.  
  
Clearing the dishes, Stiles actually forgets about his phone as he gets lost in cleaning the kitchen. Even managing to stay away while he watches a baseball game on TV with his dad until he decides to get ready for bed.  
  
A quick shower and some minty fresh breath later, Stiles grabs his phone and sighs heavily upon seeing no notifications. Dammit, all he wants to do is talk! Stiles groans in frustration at Derek’s emotional constipation and angrily types out a message, sending it before he can change his mind.

_11:30pm Stiles: i gave you a boner don’t ignore me_

* * *

The blank screen of his phone just pisses him off in the morning. As does the fact that the Camaro is missing from the driveway, which means that Derek took the time to run over and pick it up in the middle of the night while everyone was asleep. “ _Asshole_!” he yells to the empty room.

Stiles almost skips class just to confront the 'wolf. _Almost_. Except he’s responsible now and takes his education seriously. Without the threat of big bads and being deathly ill, Stiles promised not to skip classes even if he is in college and _‘it’s not like attendance will actually count against me, dad!_ ’ It’s a well-worn argument.

Thankfully, it’s Friday, and he only has morning classes so by the time lunch rolls around, Stiles is parking his baby blue jeep right next to Derek’s Camaro.

Slamming the jeep door, Stiles races up the steps and pounds on the door. “Open up! I know you’re here, Derek! Stop ignoring me, asshole!” It’s a good thing, Derek doesn’t haven’t neighbors; otherwise one of them would have surely called the police on him.

“You can’t avoid me, Derek! I came prepared!” Stiles stalks back to his car and grabs a plastic bag full of snacks he picked up as well as a cushion in preparation of sitting on Derek’s porch to wait him out. He cranks his phone’s volume up and begins to play ‘ _Hungry like the Wolf_ ’ because he knows that Derek just ~~loves~~ hates the song with a fiery passion.

After the 5th playthrough, Stiles hears stomping in the house and can just picture Derek and his trademark scowl. He wouldn’t be surprised if the ‘wolf were on the other side of the door boring holes through the wood.

Stiles waits him out, singing along. “... _with the ground, I'm on the hunt, I'm after you_ …”

Suddenly, he can hear a familiar howl from in the house. “Is that…?” He strains to listen and sure enough— “... _Hey there Little Red Riding Hood, You sure are looking good_ …” Stiles barks out a laugh at the familiar song. “Yeah, I _like_ that song, asshole!” In fact, he turns his own music off and starts humming along.

The front door is wrenched open, and Derek appears, lips pressed in a tight line. “What do you want, Stiles?” The tone is full of resignation.

“ _What do I want_? Are you kidding me?!” Stiles jumps up from his seated position and barrels into Derek’s chest, jabbing a finger into the hard flesh. “You—! You didn’t answer my calls or my texts! You just fucking left and then _ignored_ me! And for what reason? Because my _mouth_ made you hard?!” Derek makes a face, and Stiles sputters, pushing against Derek’s chest. “ _Oh my God_! You know what I mean! It turned you on, and now you’re being weird.”

“I’m not being weird because I got turned on by you, Stiles!”

“Then what the fuck?! What am I supposed to think when you ignore me? God, this has been worse than when I thought you hated me for having a crush on you.” Now if Stiles had been paying attention, instead of trying to talk over Derek, he would have heard the following—

“I was worried because I thought that _you’d_ get weird about it. I thought ‘ _Great! Now he knows how I feel, that I like him_ ’ and won’t want to be friends anymore.”

“ _Wait, what_?” is said unison, the pair looking at each other with identical expressions, wide eyes, mouth hanging open.

Stiles puts a hand up in a silencing manner. “You like me? Like, _like me_ , like me?”

Derek groans and runs a hand down his face in a way that makes Stiles wonder if the ‘wolf is questioning all his life choices. Stiles won't blame him if he is. Stiles knows how difficult he is. In fact, besides his dad, Derek is one of the few people who seems to be able to put up with Stiles and his spastic self. Which is why Stiles’ crush on Derek was inevitable.

“Yes, Stiles.” Stiles watches as the tips of Derek’s ears turn pink. He hadn’t realized the ‘wolf could blush. “I like you. I was worried it would change things, that it would be awkward for you to be around me knowing how I feel about you.”  
  
Derek’s eyes are downcast by the time he’s done speaking, and that just won’t do at all. “Did you miss the part about the crush?” he asks, ducking his head to try and draw Derek’s attention back up.  
  
“I didn’t know about the crush.”  
  
“Dude, how could you not know?” Stiles has his hands on his hips and a ‘ _what the fuck_ ’ look on his face. “Seriously? I wasn’t exactly subtle.”

“You were always going on about Lydia and then kept asking Danny if he thought you were attractive. How does that equate to having a crush on _me_?” Stiles scoffs at the impressive height at which Derek’s left eyebrow now sits.

“Of course I’m not gonna go on about my crush _in front of you_!” Stiles, well past exasperated, throws his hands in the air. “You never gave anyone a second glance! Always scowling at anyone who ever dared be attracted to the all great Derek Hale!”

And just like the previous day of turning into toddlers rather than having a mature conversation, they start yelling at each other.

“Yeah! Because I didn’t want any of them, I wanted you!”

“Then why didn’t you ever say anything?!”

“Right! So you could laugh in my face and ride off into the sunset with Lydia! Besides it’s not like you said anything!”

“Oh my God! Yeah, cause I was desperately _trying_ to get punched in the face, _not_!””

It’s quite comical, especially with the way they inch closer and closer until their chests are touching again. Almost like one of those movie moments where, as soon as they’re both at the height of their emotions will just grab each other and—

It happens fast. Stiles grabs a fist full of Derek’s shirt while Derek grips his hips, pulling forward, and suddenly their teeth clang as their lips meet in an enthusiastic kiss.

“So stupid. We’re so fucking stupid. Could have been doing this for _years_!” Stiles quips as he gasps for breath.

Derek continues to mouth along his neck, pulling gasps and moans from his throat.

Stiles brings his hands up and winds them around Derek’s shoulders. When the ‘wolf’s hands grip his ass, he jumps, wrapping his legs around Derek’s waist. “Jesus Christ! I’ve _dreamt_ about this!”

“Should have known nothing could shut you up…” Derek backs them up until Stiles is pressed against the door.  
  
“Well, you’re not exactly keeping my mouth occupied now are you?” Stiles smirks when Derek groans into his shoulder.

“God, as good as this feels, I don’t want to jump straight into sex, Stiles. I wanna do this right. I wanna talk to your dad, make sure he’s okay with this. Proper dates where I pick you up and take you out to dinner or a movie or a walk in the park.”

Stiles chuckles lightly and breathes into Derek’s ear. “Derek. Are you wanting to woo me? Wine and dine me like a gentleman?”  
  
Rolling his eyes, Derek huffs in annoyance. “Dammit, Stiles. I’m trying to be serious. I like you, okay? I don’t just want sex, I wanna be your boyfriend.”  
  
The laughter dies on Stiles’s lips as he takes in Derek’s expression. He unwraps his legs from Derek’s waist and stands in front of the ‘wolf. “I want that, too.” His hands come forward, pulling Derek in by the back of the neck. A chaste brush of lips that sparks more desire in him knowing the possible future he has. “Now come on,” he says grabbing one of Derek’s hands as he pulls the man down the stairs.  
  
“What? Where are we going?”  
  
“Well... I’m taking you home with me, where I’ll introduce you to my dad, _as my boyfriend_ , and then we’ll have dinner, clean up, and go to my room where I’ll give you the blowjob you should have gotten yesterday.” Stiles smirks as Derek hits his head climbing into the jeep. “You alright there, boyfriend?”

Derek groans and puts his head in his hands. “I’m dating an idiot.”  
  
“ _Yeah…_ ” Stiles says, fondly. “But I’m _your_ idiot.”

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments give me life <3
> 
> i’ve got a [tumblr](http://evanesdust.tumblr.com/)


End file.
